Cat out of the bag! part 3, by Mirage

[Mirage]

Cat out of the bag! part 2, by Mirage

As I picked Rachel off the floor and put her on the bed, I wonder if I can repair her damage. I went to get my tools and laptop and sat beside her. After analysing the damage, I was releived to find that I could do the repairs to Rachel myself. The worst was a few torn cables, that I suddered back together. I installed the pulled circuits back into their slots and attached the wires to them. I took a deep breath and press the flashing green button, reactivating her. She openned her eyes, as she finished rebooting "JIM! WHY!? Let me be broken! I don't want to be alive no more! We have no future together!" she screamed out, as I grabbed her hard and would not let her go. "Rachel! STOP IT!! STOP!! Don't you love me no more??? What was our love for you???" I yelled back to her. Her eyes, full of tears "I.. of course I love you.. but is my love for you, real? Or just a program? I... Everything about me is artificial!!! I HATE IT!!! I HATE MACHINES! ROBOTS AND ANDROIDS!!! THEY ARE A MOCKERY OF LIFE!!!!.. hate it... and... and.. I am one of them...." she burst into tears. I hugged her hard, we cried together, until nightfall.

We look at each others eyes, lying in bed together, naked. "What now?" she simply ask. "Nothing as changed, we go on with our lives. My love for you is still the same, I still want to marry you." I responded. She cringed a bit, bitting her lip, pulling her face away from me "But..things will never be the same.. I am just a machine now.." Rachel mumbled out. I lied my head on her right shoulder, and with my left hand, press inside her naval. Rachel didn't even flintched has her stomach opened up. I took my laptop and connected it to her A.I. system with a USB cable. "What are you going to do me?" she ask, showing no emotions. "Erasing some of your memories.. I want things back to normal." I told her, as I dissabled her from moving. "No! NO! Don't you dare..e..e...."
she stop moving, as I erased her memorie file of the last 24 hours from her CPU.

"Jim? What happened? I can't remember what I did since yesterday." Rachel asked me, looking at the time. "You had one of your attacks, you lied in bed all day long. How are you feeling now?" I asked her, worried. "Good, I guess... I am so sorry.. Thank you of taking care of me..". Rachel smiled, feeling embarassed. "Now, let's get ready, I'll go with you to your appointment with Doctor Strunt, if you don't mind." I told her, getting ready to leave. "Sure." she replied, getting also dress. On our way to her doctor's appointment, we chitchat a bit, as I was testing her to see if she completely had forgotten then last 24 hours. To my releif, her memories were truly erased, sparing her from her true nature. "What's wrong?" She ask me, as she caught me staring at her, thinking of her as an android. "Er..nothing.. yesterday, I saw a commercial about new androids coming out, very realistic looking." I tested her reaction. "Robots? Fuck them.I hate them! You know... why make them? Serioulsly? If someone is so desperate in life, that they need a machine to fuck, they have failed in life!" she snickered. "But what about love?" I then ask. "Love??? A machine can't love! What the hell you have been smoking??!" she chuckled harder. "I hope you are not thinking of cheating on me with a fuckdroid!" Rachel then grilled me. "What??? Of course not! But still, you don't think a robot and a human could love each other?" I continued. "Okay... let's say you were an android, maybe I would... but that it's a big maybe." she laughed out. "Me, an android?" I myself laughed loudly. "What? are you talking about ME, as a robot? Are you nuts? I rather kill myself than being a machine!" Rachel then said, amused by my questions. I rolled my eyes, knowing I was pushing the subject too hard now. I then steared the conversation on what to eat for dinner.

We arrived at the doctor's office a bit early, and entered the small office. His secretary welcomed us and ask Rachel to follow her. I sat down on one of the chairs and grabbed one of the old magazines, they always have for waiting patients. "See you soon!" smiled Rachel, as she dissapeared behind his office door. I waited a few minutes, as his secretary sat back at her desk. I slowly put down the magazine and quickly dashed for the doctor's door. Before the secretary could stop me, I was inside his office. "Do you know what my fiance asked me today? If I was a robot, could I love him back? He's sooo crazy! Me, a robot??? AH! " Rachel was saying outloud to Doctor Strung. He turned around, surprised at my entrance. I was more surprise than him actually, as I saw Rachel's head in his hands, wires attached to it, from her naked body, wich was in multiple pieces, on a huge metalic table, circuits and computers attached to it. "JIM! What are you doing here, you are suppose to wait for me outside!" Rachel's head yelled out to me. "Er... let me explain this..." Doctor Strung said to me, as he deactivated Racheal's head and put it sotfly on the table.

To be continued.

[Mirage]

here a quick sketch of Rachel. This drawing is from a future part of the story.

[Devil]

Another awesome installment Mirage. I can't wait to see what is ahead with that sketch!

[DollSpace]

I like this story, definitely. There are a few grammatical and spelling mistakes, but I know English isn't your first language and I only really know one.. lol .. Anyway, great sketch, and the storyline has a lot of promise. You may want to take it a little slower but also describe your character's surroundings more, their motivations, etc. It just seemed like the story was on speed for some of it and then random fembot sex and deactivation. I love your stories, and you have the ability to create characters that are very believable and sympathetic that people care about deeply. There is also the wonderful way you have of describing malfunctions & building a compelling story arc, but you're just as talented at giving the public what they want: "androids revealed to be androids either to the reader or one of the characters in the story, and then they have hot erotic sex". That's grossly oversimplifying but I think this story needs a bit more balance to it, as the main character almost seems manic at times; the fact that Rachel hates herself because she's a robot (well, for the short time she's conscious about it) is a great counterpoint, though, and can provide even more emotional depth and more robot-related scenes, if you know what I mean. Please keep writing this; I enjoy reading it a lot.

[Robjoe]

I'm not that far into this (though I liked the beginning), but I really feel the need to mention this right now, before you go any further:

When writing dialogue, it's best to start a new paragraph each time a different person speaks. This is especially important when it's one-on-one dialogue, as names aren't frequently restated like they are in group scenes.

Not to cut you down or anything, but your writing is often hard to follow because I have to stop and think about who's currently speaking.

If you can get in the habit of doing that, it'll be a lot easier to read. I can forgive the other errors, as I realize English isn't your main language. Like DollSpace, I only speak one language, so you're doing a lot better than I would at writing in a foreign language! =P

Anyway, I hope to get caught up soon... both on this story and the others I have sitting in my backlog.

[Mirage]

I totally agree with everyones comments, but you need to realised, my time frame is very small, when I can type, like last night, I had only 3 hours, so, I type as fast as I can, trying to spellcheck it when I have the time (last night, didn't have time), also wanted to give a quick sketch. Also, having freaking 3 cats around, dont fucking help! Sadly, I know my stories and writing do pay the price in my limited time, but I figure, eh, at least it's barely readable! (L). So, please forgive me in all my typos, and I do want to flesh out more my characters many times, but like mentionned, I don't have the time! Until I win the freaking Lottery, and have my own editor (that would be great!), please take pity of me! (L).

Mirage

[A.N.N.]

I always like your stories Mirage. Please keep writing, anyway you can.