Super Fembot Cheerleaders from Space! - Chapter 9

[Teknophile]

Hi, everyone! It took me a while to retype the parts that got wiped from my hard drive, but here it is: Chapter 9!

Once again, many thanks to Sthurmovik for his helpful advice and constructive criticism, and to all of you folks who have read and commented on this story so far.

And now, on with the show!

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Super Fembot Cheerleaders from Space!

Chapter 9: This Apartment Ain't Big Enough for the Both of Us

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"Hi! We're home," Nate called, trying to smile cheerfully while slowly entering his second-floor apartment.

E3 glanced up from her paper ... and scowled as A7C walked in behind Nate. Clad in a pair of Nate's jeans and a too-big T-shirt that hung loosely off her petite form, the Asian fembot returned the glare. "Hey, what's your problem?"

"Take a wild guess," the blonde shot back acidly.

"Hey, um, A7C, would you mind hanging out in my room for a while?" the human asked. "There's, um, a little TV and a DVD player in there for you."

"Right," A7C replied, still looking at E3. "Of course the psycho with the plasma blasters gets the sofa. What did you do, threaten him?"

"Yeah right! Maybe he just prefers the company of intelligent people, as opposed to little ditzy droids that don't even know the difference between B and C ..."

"All right, that's enough!" declared Nate. "A7C, just stay away from her for now, all right? E3, you and I need to talk, now."

Still sulking, the japanese-looking gynoid trudged into Nate's bedroom and locked the door, while the human made his way over to the couch and sat down opposite the bad-tempered blonde. "Just what is your problem, anyway?" he demanded.

"What's my problem? What do you think! That little ... moron gets us all stranded here, loses our ship, we're going to be stuck on this Link-forsaken rock for a slagging kilocycle, and everyone just lets her off the hook! It's like, 'oh, you're so young and cute that we don't fragging care how badly you screw up'! I have a life, you know? And in the Interlink, one kilocycle in objective time is like ten in subjective time. What if, by the time we get back, I don't even have a job anymore? Or if my friends have changed grid loci and I can't get in contact with them again? For all I know, I may have to start my life over from scratch, and it's not even my fault - it's hers!"

"All right," Nate said. "So, you're worried that this whole stuck on Earth thing is going to cause you long-term problems. How is being mad at A7C going to help fix any of that?"

E3's face took on a surprisingly human expression of anger mixed with surprise and confusion. She opened her mouth, thought better of it, then opened it again and snapped, "Well of course I can't fix it now, but somebody's got to teach that stupid 'bot to be responsible! It's bad enough that she nearly crashed into a star, but she had to bring us along, too!"

"So, what, you're like her personal tutor on responsibility? You're just going to keep rubbing it in her face until ... what? She apologizes?"

"I already did!" a high-pitched, slightly muffled voice shouted from the bedroom. "You think I wanted to crash the ship? I'm stranded here too, you know!"

Nate groaned. Wonderful, he thought to himself, I'm trying to make peace between two stubborn alien robots. My life is turning into a bad sci-fi movie ....

Turning back to E3, he said, as gently as possible, "Look. I know you're mad at her, and everyone agrees that she screwed up bigtime, but holding a grudge and being hostile makes you look like the creep."

"Whaaat--?"

"I didn't say you were a creep, but the way you're acting toward A7C, it makes you look like the one who's being immature. I mean, for crying out loud, you two sound like a pair of grade-schoolers when you fight!"

E3 gave the human a sharp look, then sighed and leaned back on the couch. "Fine. Everyone else takes her side, so why not you?"

Nate groaned. "Nobody's taking sides! I'm just pointing out that having you two being mad at each other all the time is counter-productive. I mean, you all want to get off Earth as soon as possible, right? You're going to have to learn to at least put up with A7C while you're here, or else ... well, suppose both of you were working at the roundhouse tonight. What if you couldn't work together, so nothing would get done for twelve hours? You see the problem?"

"So ... you want me not to remind her about how badly she's screwed up, so we're not fighting all the time and we get home faster?"

"Right."

E3 looked thoughtful, then nodded reluctantly. "All right. I promise not to act mad at A7C."

With those words, Nate heaved a sigh of relief. Finally! "Great. Thanks. That'll help make these next couple of weeks a lot less stressful."

After sitting quietly for a few minutes, Nate decided it was time for some entertainment. "Hey, E3? Do you want to watch a movie?"

"A movie ... that's like a simulation, right? Only non-interactive?"

"Yeah. You know, like a story told with sound and pictures."

The blonde shrugged. "Sure, why not. Is there a specific one you have in mind?"

Nate walked over to his DVD cabinet and looked around. There were a couple of action flicks, an Adam Sandler movie ... "Hey, how about this?" he asked, holding up a case with TRANSFORMERS written across the top.

E3 looked at the box, scanning the title and the images below it. "What's it about?"

Nate smiled. "Giant, shape-changing alien robots who get stuck on Earth. Sound like fun?"

E3 felt a little half-smile tugging at the corner of her lips. "You mean, fictional giant robots? Made up by pre-singularity organics? This should be good for some laughs ...."

Nate slid the disc into his Blu-ray player and grabbed the remote. "Hey, um ... do you mind if I invite A7C to watch the movie, too?"

E3 stiffened, and Nate felt himself tense. Moment of truth ....

"Fine," she muttered. "I promise not to flip out at her while we're watching your movie."

In that moment, it was as though a leaden weight seemed to lift from the human's shoulders. "Thank you!"

A tiny creak sounded, and a pair of almond-shaped eyes peeked out from behind Nate's bedroom door. "Does this mean I can come out now?" A7C asked timidly.

"Sure. Just promise not to bug E3, all right?"

"Me? Bug her? She's the one who's always--!"

Nate made a loud, coughing sort of sound, and A7C trailed off. "All right, I promise."

"Great!" Nate exclaimed, trying to sound cheerful as he mad his way back to the couch, sitting down between the two uneasy roommates. The lights dimmed, the show started, and within moments, both E3 and A7C were engrossed in the film. For Nate, watching the girls' reactions was even more interesting than the movie.

"Wow, look at that! That helicopter guy is so hot! He just took on an entire military base by himself!"

"Um, you do realize that the humans are the good guys in this movie, right? And that the helicopter guy is evil?"

"Well, yeah, but bad guys can be hot too. I mean, wow! Did you see the cannon on that one ...?"

"Ooh, look at all those little parts! How does he juggle all those motor processes?"

"A7C, he's just computer-animated. Besides, how hard do you think it would be to maintain a shell like that? With all those little moving parts, I bet any real robot with a shell like his would need maintenance once every five decacycles."

"Oh ... my ... Maker! Helicopter guy, move over! That Optimus Prime is built like a slagging earth mover!"

"Yeah, but Bumblebee is way cuter."

"No way! Bumblebee is a wimp!"

"A wimp? He just took on that police-car guy and left him sparking in the dust! Bumblebee's no wimp, and unlike some people, older bots just don't do all that much for me."

"Hey! Just what are you implying?"

"Oh, nothing - I guess it's just natural, you know, with you being so old like he is ... "

Oh, crap. "Whoa, whoa, hey! No disrespecting anyone, okay?"

E3 didn't seem to notice the human. She leaned forward to glare past Nate at A7C. "Are you calling me old?"

"Well, duh! I mean, what are you? A hundred gigacycles? Two hundred? I think it was something like that ...."

"Oh yeah? Well at least I'm not some stuck-up little twerp who thinks she can just cutesy her way through life!"

"No, you're a mean, crotchety old nag who carries a pair of plasma blasters around because you're totally psycho!"

"Why, you little--!" E3's sapphire optics glowing with rage, she jumped up off the couch and pointed her arm at A7C. Nate felt his heart plummet into his gut as he heard an all-too-familiar vree-chk! and the barrel of one of E3's guns deployed from inside her forearm.

"Jeezus! For crying out loud, stop fighting! Can't you two even watch a freaking movie without--!"

BLAM! A bolt of blue-white plasma hit A7C at point-blank range, sending her flying off the couch and slamming into the wall. Arcs of electrical discharge crackled across the Japanese girl's body.

"Oh my God, you just killed --!"

"She wishes!" snarled A7C. The Asian girl lurched to her feet. A huge, black-edged hole had been burned in the middle of her borrowed T-shirt, her face was blackened with soot, and her normally straight black hair was standing on end like she'd just had a date with the electric chair. Otherwise, the deceptively petite, dainty-looking gynoid seemed mostly unharmed - and hopping mad.

"You ... you crazy glitch! Look what you did to my fragging shirt! And my hair ...!"

"Serves you right, short stuff," E3 replied smugly.

"All right, that's it! I'm tired of you treating me like a slagging child all the time! You want a fight? Well, you've got one now!"

Suddenly, a whoosh came from behind her, and A7C literally flew at E3, catching the taller girl off-guard and carrying her backward, out the sliding door (Thank God I kept it open to let the breeze in! Nate thought), and right over the patio rail, plummeting down to the parking lot below.

"Were those engines?!?" Nate exclaimed aloud, running outside and looking down on the action. Sure enough, what remained of A7C's shirt was on fire, and from her back protruded two stubby cylinders that looked like miniature jet engines, each with a blue-white flame. On closer inspection, Nate realized that some sections of her calves and shoulders had opened as well, probably to let out exhaust from hidden maneuvering thrusters.

Like two gladiatrixes in a macadam arena, the gynoids faced each other, A7C crouched and ready to leap or fly at her opponent, E3 with both of her forearm blasters out and glaring venemously at her lighter opponent.

"Well, come on! We're going to settle this right here, right now!"

"Right!" shouted A7C, and rocketed straight at the other girl.

E3 let lose with a rapid-fire barrage of charged plasma, but A7C shot up and out of her line of fire. Looking on from his patio, Nate winced as the stray energy blasts vaporized a four-foot-wide section of the brick wall that surrounded his apartment complex.

"Stop it! There are other people here in the building! For crying out loud, STOP SHOOTING!"

Heedless of the human's pleading, the two gynoids kept at it, E3 firing energy blasts and A7C dodging them, weaving and zooming in all directions like a humanoid hummingbird. Darting behind E3, A7C set her thrusters to maximum and slammed into her back before her opponent could finish turning around. "Take that!" she cried, driving E3 fifty feet and into the security wall, powdered red brick flying everywhere.

"Oh, shit!" Nate groaned. "Mister Nimvicki is going to have a coronary! I've got to stop them now, before they hit someone's car!"

As the human frantically headed for the stairwell, the girls' battle had degenerated into a catfight. Both gynoids were punching and jabbing at one another, each errant blow leaving a fist-sized crater in the macadam. Occasionally, one of the girls would grab the other's hair or ears, bringing forth a yelp of pain. To make matters worse, A7C's shirt had completely burned away, exposing her sensitive breasts to attack. E3 was only in marginally better shape; her slinky blue dress obviously hadn't been designed for strenuous physical activity, and had torn open in several places, her C-cups jutting out of the top. Dirty and disheveled, the formerly perfect-looking gynoids now looked like something out of a catfight porn flick.

"You ... stupid...ouch!"

"Crazy ... stubborn ...arrgh!"

"Self-centered ...nnff!"

"Mean ...eek!"

WHOOOOOOSH!

Suddenly, both fighters broke apart, sputtering and coughing as some kind of wierd white foam covered them. "What the scrap ...?"

"Time out!" Nate shouted, still aiming the fire extinguisher at his troublesome roommates. "Both of you, stop fighting and LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE!!!"

As the girls rubbed the foam from their optics, it only took a moment for them to see the holes they had blasted out of the wall, along with various craters and melted patches of tar.

A7C - naked from the waist up - stared with wide eyes and slack jaw. "Uh-oh ...."

E3 winced as she realized just how the other tenants would react in the morning. "Oh ... frag." The brick-powdered blonde looked up at Nate. "Sorry?"

It took a supreme effort of will for Nate not to douse them again. Remember, you're the one who told E3 not to hold grudges. Not that that worked out too well ....

Taking a deep breath, Nate tried to speak calmly. "Both of you are coming back inside with me. I'm going to call up G2J and K4L and have them bring the fabricator here to fix all this crap you did. Then, we're going to settle this stupid feud of yours for good, my way ...."

---

Trees and streetlights flashed past as two fembots raced across Claremont, G2J carrying the silver briefcase that contained their fabricator.

"Did he say how much damage they did?" K4L asked, clearly worried as they leaped over a chain-link fence.

"He said they smashed a wall and punched some holes in the ground. Thank the Maker nobody else woke up, or we'd have been in deep slag ...."

Finally, the two fembots rounded a corner and slowed down, keying in Nate's access code and heading inside, K4L scrambling the security cameras - Nate had warned them that his landlord might get suspicious if he saw them moving freely in and out of the apartment and staying for hours.

As they reached the top of the stairwell, the girls could already hear the sound of weapons fire.

K4L muttered a curse. "Listen, they've started fighting again! Don't they have any self-control at all?"

"Slaggit, come on!" G2J exclaimed, quickly unlocking the door and flinging it wide open, to reveal ...

Nate, E3 and A7C all sitting on the couch, controllers in hand, playing some kind of primitive VR game.

"What the ...?" K4L murmured, mouth agape.

"Ha! Take that! And that! I love this Spartan Laser thing!!!"

"Ow! All right, you asked for it - eat grenades, blue girl!"

KABOOM!!

"Hey! What the slag was--?"

"Ha ha! I got you both. Frag grenade all the way!" Nate laughed.

The newcomers exchanged blank looks, then grinned as they realized what was going on.

"Um ... Nate? What is ...?"

Suddenly aware of the new girls' presence, Nate paused the game. "Oh, hi. We were just playing Halo 3."

K4L walked over to examine the Xbox 360 under Nate's television set. "Huh. Not much of a virtual reality system, but the game sure looks fun."

"Yeah. Want to try? I've got another controller in here someplace ...."

As the human crouched down, G2J looked on with a bemused smile. "I'm heading outside to fix the damage. Try not to kill each other, all right?"

"Oh, I've already killed A7C five times over," E3 replied.

"Oh yeah? Well, I ran you over with a Warthog!"

Using simulated violence to avert the real thing. A very clever strategy, especially considering he's never even experienced a virtual environment. "All right. Keep at it then."

As the sounds of gunfire and explosions started up again, G2J walked out, silver briefcase in hand, thanking her Maker for Nate Aldridge and his video game.

[Bart]

I have read it, I can't unread it! This story has it all! Transformers on BluRay, XBOX 360. NICE! Oh, and hot alien fembots of course Thanks for sharing it.

I wonder if they will take Nate with them? Will one of the girls stay on earth? Anyhow, I can't wait to see more!