THE BRYTESTAR FILES: The Christmas Special

Brytestar · Post by **Brytestar** » Sat Dec 25, 2010 9:53 am

<With Jake back in his Metro Detroit home. Things hopefully calming down enough for some normalcy. The tree all decorated ready to show off the spirit of the holiday season. Alicia and a few other gynoids were wearing the red christmas strapless bikinis outfit with the white furry trim with the santa hats. Jake walks in wearing a red t-shirt and red shorts with black slippers and like the gynoids wearing a santa hat as well.>

JAKE: Now then concidering all we went thru this year we need a break.

SCRUPTOUS ALICIA: Yes master we reprogrammed Buffybot and now she is with us forever. Of course we had to cleanup Aprilbot's little mess with her.

APRIL: Blame Warren for that I'm glad the he got it. Hey Lyndadoll can you use your hydrolic system...

LYNDADOLL: Yes....

<Lyndadoll places the star of the tree and everything is set.>

BUFFYBOT: ..........

JAKE: You know the rules no slicing and dicing after new years. Think of it as a test of will.

BUFFYBOT: ...........

<Lucky for Jake he can mindzap them anytime he wishes.>

JAKE: Now let's open the presents. While we are doing that...

<He looks into the camera>

JAKE: From all of us at The Brytestar Files...

ALL: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!

minkwheel · Post by **minkwheel** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 7:52 am

BUFFYBOT--THE REALLY REAL ONE, FOR REAL>>>> Jeebus Chrysler! -- I'm TOTALLY STUCK HERE........AAAAACTING, and all of those giggling toasters with hair are getting PRESENTS! --- well.....I'll give a gift to my new mmmmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaassssster.....Cripes...did I just SAY what I THOUGHT I said? ----I'm frikkin' LOSING IT!!!!---oh...REPROGRAMMING SUCKS A BIG ONE.....How can I get around this and still get PAID? -------THOSE MINDZAPPING bits REALLY FRIGGIN' HURT! GOTTA THINK OF SOMETHING FAST, because I'm MISSING THE FOOTBALL PLAYOFFS sticking around here!----Mamma wants her comfy chair, and bigass bigscreen tv to watch tight ass QB CUTIES IN GLORIOUS 1080p-ness!!! Damn the torpedos, I'm going for a HOAGIE too.........thinkthinkthink..........GOT IT! Now, I have to set the scene.......Oh........Mmmmmmmaaaasterrrrr-r-r??? Uuullkk--!

UNAWARE BRYTESTAR>>>>>>Yes? --my overpowered Lovely? --Oh, I just LOVE it that she can't DO anything without me KNOWING about it.... it pleases me to no end...........WHAT DO YOU WANT, Buffypoo???

BUFFYPOO---UHH...BOT, yeah...BUFFYBOT>>>>> FOR YOU TO STOP CALLING ME BUFFYPOO, and toOW OOWWWW OOOWWWW!!!! Mindzapping isn't KOSHER MAN!!!---Frikkin' A!!! OWW!! ----MMMMmmmmmmmaaaa-s-sster----it is SNOWING outside....may I see if it is safe for you to drive by inspecting he Jakemobile and making a path in the driveway for you???

POOR, UNAWARE JAKE BRYTESTAR>>>>oh my..YES!-- WHILE I HANG HERE ALL COZY, MAKE YOURSELF USEFUL, BUFFYPOO....you KNOW where the SHOVEL IS.......make it WORK.

BUFFYBOT, NOT BUFFYPOO---well, MAYBE LATER, after she eats that HOAGIE>>>>>>>> oh....I KNOW WHERE IT IS......AAAaaaand iiiiiIII'D LIKE TO PUT IT-------------to GOOD USE, Mmmmmmaster!--- I will go outside NOW.

POOR UNAWARE, I hope that his insurance is paid up JAKE BRYTESTAR >>>>>GOOD GIRL!!!

SEVERAL GIGGLING TOASTERS WITH HAIR>>>>> gigglegigglegiggle/ tittertittertitter!! MASTER....WOULD YOU LIKE SOME TOAST?

JAKE BRYTESTAR SPOUTING SOME PRETTY TERRIBLE PORNEAUX DIALOGUE >>>>> OH...I'LL TAKE A HOT PIECE RIGHT NOW!!!

BUFFYBOT>>>>>>UUUFFFF!!! ----can NOT FIND....SHOVEL..........but CAN SUB--STI--TUTE SLEDGEHAMMER....AND THIS RUSTY MACHETTE....... (swings hammer SLEDGEDLY several times in, on and around the JAKEMOBILE to see if the airbags deploy, AND IF THE CRASH ZONES actually CRASH.......they DO. --THIS IS A BIG JOB FOR THE "DING KING" I can assure you.....
Buffybot then takes the rusty machette and slashes four tires and the spare

BUFFYBOT BEING A GOOD GIRL OBEYING HER MmmmmmASTER>>>> MORE TREDS ON THE GROUND AROUND YOUR CAR MEANS THAT THE TIRES GRIP IN THE SNOW BETTER.....I AM SMART.............aaaaaaaand I am OUTSIDE..........................................AAAAAAND I..........am.......... FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! NOW TO CASH THIS CHECK OF HIS before he mindzaps me again....i cant TELL you how I friggin' HATE that!!! I'm CONIN' HOME TO MY COMFY CHAIR AND TIGHTASS QB's! ---- anybody know a good SUBBIE SHOP around this Burg? -- I'm FREEEEEEE!!!!

MEANWHILE---JAKE must REALLY be enjoying his TOAST not to notice the TOW TRUCK in the driveway...... the odds seem stacked against him ... but I hear that NATIONWIDE is on his side....and THERE'S A gekko knocking at the door. ---- aside from selling insurance, he happens to know a GREAT sub shop up the street....so ALL IS FREAKIN' SWEET.

ENJOY THE PLAYOFFS and the SUPERBOWL kids. Buffybot will.

Brytestar · Post by **Brytestar** » Sun Jan 09, 2011 10:13 am

OOC: That makes a good segway setup for this upcoming part of our tale! Mink, since you started the insurance plugs....

---------------

<Jake quickly mindzaps our Buffypoo after his car was towed away never to be seen again. Which is ok for our hero...>

BUFFYPOO (In mindless mode now): I'm sorry my perfect master....

ALICIA: You should be you just couldn't wait and New Years was a week away. (She pouts letting Jake know how she feels about it.)

JAKE: Like a good neighbor....with...

ALICIA: The vines of death...

JAKE: Oh no you don't...Buffypoo is too good for that. (The vines of death are gone.) ...Pub Barker!

PUB BARKER: and...a...new truck of power!

(The truck of power appears causing as mindless Buffypoo waves from inside the truck.)

JAKE: I would've called E-Surance but Erinbot was deactivated. Now Buffybot will be back in time for the Pro Bowl. At least a couple of my Lions made it.

Enjoy the Pro Bowl and Superbowl. Jake and the squad will along with Buffybot!

minkwheel · Post by **minkwheel** » Sun Feb 06, 2011 6:32 am

..........aaaaaaaaaaand while JAKE and his toasters with hair watch the PRO BOWL..........Buffybot hotwires the 'TRUCK OF POWER" and high tails it out of Jake's grasp with HEMI POWERED STYLE.

BUFFYBOT ON THE LAMB>>>> Oh, YOU'LL PAY, JAKEY-poo.... YOU'LL PAY!!! -Damn SKIPPY, He'll PAY.... this TRUCK OF POWER sucks down GAS like a SONOVABITCH! ---HE'LL PAY ALRIGHT! -- FILL'ER UP MAC! -- A FULL TANK OF GO JUICE IS ON JAKE.......and I'm off to my COMFY CHAIR AND BIG SCREEN TV IN TIME FOR THE SUPERBOWL!!!! --YEAH BABY!!!

------OH, HEY.... while I'm AT IT.... I'll run into the gas station's overly priced quik-e-mart, and get overly priced SNACKAGE on Jake's dime for the BIG GAME...... I LOVE PLASTIC MONEY. CREDIT IS 'SOOOO AMERICAN" --and I'm feeling VERY PATRIOTIC right now..... 'CHAAAAAAARGE IT!!!!"

....AND SO IT GOES..... BUFFYBOT BUYS UP CHEETOS, HO HO'S TOSTITOS, DORITOS, ZINGERS, CHEEZ-ITS TWINKIES, SUZI Q.s RING DINGD, DING DONGS, KING DONS, YODELS, DIPSY DOODLES, SLIM JIM'S, POCKY, KRIMPETS, ROLD GOLD, PRINGLES, SUN CHIPS, CHIPS AHOY, FAMOUS ANUS, MOON PIES, ESKIMO PIES, NUTTY BUDDIES, REESE'S CUPS, KIT KATS, SWEET TARTS, RAZZLES, MIKE AND IKES, GOOD 'N' PLENTYS, oh, just add in your favorites here, the list will go on for a few more lines................and to wash it down............MTN DEW the drink for lazy Americans who can't even spell out the word 'MOUNTAIN" anymore ...Buffybot picks up the new MNT DEW WHITEOUT... looks like dirty water, drinks like sweet sweet sugar .... (ACTUALLY FOLKS, I LIKE IT, BUT IT SURE DOESN'T MIX WELL WITH CERTAIN FOODS...really..... TOP THAT OFF WITH DR. PEPPER, PEPSI MAX LIME, NEW ZEALAND'S L& P (a personal fave of mine) FRESCA, FANTA, CHEERWINE, SHASTA, SQUIRT, and PEPSI VANILLA.....oh there's more... I just want to get this bit written before the game starts.......

----oh... and a package of HEBREW NATIONAL HOT DOGS, because NOTHING ELSE WILL DO.... Buffybot's body IS a TEMPLE, you know.

GOOD THING BUFFYBOT'S got that truck to stow and tow....she's back at Minkwheel's place firing up the tv, and finding a disguise (because she's on the lamb, if you don't remember after reading all of the junk food brands a moment ago..... LOOK WHO'S WAITING FOR BUFFYBOT......

--COULD IT BE? --YES, I BELIEVE IT IS.....throw the laws of physics right out the window folks, because standing in the middle of Minkwheel's place ready to take Buffybot back to Little Detroit is JAKE'S BODACIOUS ALICIA, and some random cheerleader toasters with blonde hair... although there are some brunettes and redheads to make a politically correct mixed bag of bots...... anyway... they're taking heroic stances.... and here comes BUFFYBOT out in her disguise.......

TAAAA-DAAAAAHHH!!!

HEROIC STANCE STANCING ALICIA>>>> WELL IF IT ISN'T 'THE GREEN WHORE"......

BUFFYBOT>>>>> HORNET!!! HORNET, you FOOL! THE GREEN HORNET!!!!

Yep kids.... Buffybot is dressed as the GREEN HORNET.....cut another paycheck for product placement, Smokey.... Courtesy of the Cameo Corporation

BUFFYBOT AS THE HORNET, HORNET, YOU FOOL, THE GREEN HORNET! >>>>> STOP BUGGING ME BITCHES... I'LL USE MY GAS GUN!!! (she figgers, and wiggers the trigger.....sfx FWOOOOFFFFfffff....that's the sound of gas coming out of the gun, kids.... must I spell everything out?)

Smoke clears, and they're all still STANCING there..... WHAT GIVES???

STILL STANCING ALICIA>>>> We're ROBOTS, Dumbass! --we aren't affected by GAS.... Jeez.

BUFFYBOT AS THE GREEN HORNET>>>>> Well... SHIT. Buffybot cuts and runs to the next room while Alicia is still bodaciously stancing a heroic stance.... and then.... Buffybot CRASHES THROUGH THE DRYWALL WITH A FULL SIZE REPLICA OF GREEN HORNET'S BLACK BEAUTY..... FREAKIN' SWEET!!!

BUFFYBOT BEHIND THE WHEEL>>>>> YEAH, BUT CAN YOU HANDLE SOME OF THIS??? ----Buffybot throws several switches and buttons inside the Black Beauty and watches the fine array of firepower spewing out.... GOOD THING THAT MINKWHEEL WAS A COMIC BOOK GEEK ... HE'S GOT A BOATLOAD OF STUFF IN THIS BACK ROOM...........

JUST LOOK AT THE STEAMING PILE OF CHEERLEADERS ON THE FLOOR! ALICIA'S SMOKING HOT BOD IS literally smoking RIGHT NOW....

SMOKING PILE OF ALICIA>>>>>>UUUUFFFF!!! we'll get you yet, RIGHT GIRLS???? GIRLS????

SMOKING PILE OF CHEERLEADERS>>>> Mmmmmooooo!

STILL SMOKING ALICIA>>>>> WELL......SHIT.

BUFFYBOT finally sits in her COMFY CHAIR....>>>>>TIME FOR MY SUPERBOWL! ---CAN SOMEONE CRACK OPEN A WINDOW? SMELLS LIKE BURNT HAIR IN HERE............. got my SNACKAGE..... now it's time for the WHOLE PACKAGE!!!! ---BRING 'EM ON! --- I won't root for a RAPIST.... GOOOOOOOOOOOO Packers!!!

ENJOY THE GAME KIDS....BUFFYBOT WILL. I HAVE SOME CLEANING UP TO DO.

Brytestar · Post by **Brytestar** » Sun Feb 06, 2011 6:51 pm

<Jake shook his head as he looks at the mess>

JAKE: Enjoy the game everyone!