1011-on ONE WITH BUFFYBOT--TRANSFORMERS PREVIEW

minkwheel · Post by **minkwheel** » Wed Jun 24, 2009 3:20 am

BUFFYBOT>>> HEL-LO everyone, I'm BUFFYBOT, YES, that is ME. IT'S SUMMERTIME, and that means it's time for HOLLYWOOD to ROLL OUT more MOVIES to keep AMERICA sitting on their collective asses for a little while longer. I'M COLLECTING ANOTHER CHECK to interview MICHAEL BAY.... Director of the new TRANSFORMERS MOVIE...REVENGE OF G.M.

MICHAEL BAY>>>> UMM...REVENGE OF THE FALLEN.

BUFFYBOT>>>>.....your point IS........?
so...TELL THE CHUBBY FANBOYS ABOUT YOUR FRANCHISE MOVIE, TALENTED DIReeeeeechTOR.....

TALENTED DIReeeechTOR MICHAEL BAY>>>> Oh, IT'S BOSS! --THINGS GET BLOWED UP REEAL GOOD AND NICE! LOTS OF CGI and EFFECTS and no story to get in the way. GOTTA SELL THOSE TOYS TO THE BOYS!!!..... AND I'LL LET YOU IN ON A LITTLE SECRET, BECAUSE YOU'RE A GIRL AND YOU WON'T WATCH COOL MOVIES LIKE THIS ONE.........ALL OF THE CARS IN THIS MOVIE..........are ROBOTS IN DISGUISE!!!----

BUFFYBOT>>>>OH.....you ARE KIDDING ME, right???---REAAAAALLY REAL ROBOTS? --- IN THIS CENTURY? ----a frikkin' VISIONARY, you are, MIGHTY DIRECTOR!

MIGHTY DIRECTOR MICHAEL BAY>>>> Yes....you MAY stare in AWE of me, THERE'S EVEN A CHICK ONE in the movie...because I'm so kind.

BUFFYBOT>>> YEAH, DIReeeechTOR......I HEARD about her.... ARCEE... COOL LITTLE MOTORCYCLE CHICK........

SUPER DIRECTOR MICHAEL BAY>>>>YEAH! -- I didn't LIKE HER... she wouldn't grease my piston on the casting couch, so I BLEW HER UP in the movie....I can DO that.... I'M A DIRECTOR! ---after all.... she's ONLY A ROBOT IN DISGUISE.

BUFFYBOT>>>>>..............WELL SO AM I, DUMBASS!!!! ---HOW DARE YOU KILL AN INNOCENT FEMBOT!!! ---POOR ARCEE!!!!---

DUMBASS DIRECTOR MICHAEL BAY>>>Sarah Michelle Gellar is a ROBOT? --should've guessed, but YOU WOULDN'T BE CAST IN MY MOVIE! -- I'VE SEEN YOUR WORK!-- YOU NEED WORK DONE TO FATTEN YOUR LIPS, AND YOU AIN'T GOT NO BOOBS! -- you look like a CHIPMUNK in some scenes ...I HEAR THAT ALVIN IS CASTING FOR CHIPPETTES for the next CHIPMUNK movie.... I'll put in a good word for you!

BUFFYBOT>>>>>I'M BUFFYBOT DAMMIT! -- I'LL KICK YOUR PAMPERED HOLLYWOOD TANNED ASS FROM HERE TO FRIGGIN CYBERTRON!!! -- DUMBASS DIRECTOR!!!---( KIDS...SHE'S STARTING TO PUNCH AND KICK NOW.... MICHAEL BAY JUST HAPPENS TO BE IN THE SHOT. that's the story we're going with here to satisfy our lawyers, got that?) ---------ALL OF YOUR MONEY AND FAME ISN'T DUE TO YOUR GREAT DIRECTING ABILITY!!!---IT'S BECAUSE OF THE HUNDREDS OF ARTISTS AT I.L.M. and PYROTECHNIC guys who RISK THEYR LIVES so that you can wear that SKANKY BASEBALL HAT and yell 'ACTION" ....(punt! --kick! PUNCHITY PUNCH!) ........AND YOU KILLED POOR ARCEE!!!!!-----YOU BASTARD!!!
(punchitypunchitykickkitychoppitychop!!)

.......Oh Look! --There's a STEAMING PUDDLE OF MICHAEL BAY over there!

STEAMING PUDDLE OF MICHAEL BAY>>>>>>>>>uuuuuuuuuuunnnnhhh!!
OWWWWW!!!-------OH.......I....look awful!!!!!!!uuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnh!!!!

BUFFYBOT>>>>>>DON'T WORRY, STEAMING PUDDLE......DUMBASS DIRECTOR........YOU CAN "FIX IT IN POST!!!" F. You for EXPLOITING robots.
............................ARCEE WAS MY RIDE HOME, DAMMIT!!!!!

fection · Post by **fection** » Wed Jun 24, 2009 10:11 am

So, you... ah... liked the film then...

minkwheel · Post by **minkwheel** » Wed Jun 24, 2009 10:57 am

I missed seeing the premiere today, because Buffybot didn't get that ride home with ARCEE.... as a consolation, DREAMWORKS sent BUMBLEBEE to pick her up in his Bitchin' Camaro configuration ...... She came home with a rare smile on her face, and I'm guessing it's because she got to be in the driver's seat of a cool car...... Bumblebee confesses that he turned on his vibrating driver's seat massage for the ride home, and he feels that he got to SECOND BASE....... I'll KILL HIM. -- minkwheel